Honestly, I've felt like a bit of a hermit all winter. We haven't done much or gone anywhere. I've found myself pulling in, content to just be at home with the children, doing school, cooking and baking, sewing, reading books, being a family-at-home. I'm not sure if it's been because of being pregnant, or just the demands of a large family, or what, but that's what the last 5 months have pretty much been like.
It's a little crazy to think of a new baby joining us in a matter of days! God has had me on quite the journey this pregnancy. It went something like this:
Spring 2011: Having decided that our family is complete with 4 kids, I finally come to terms with "no more babies" and get rid of almost all my baby items, baby clothes, and maternity clothes. I grieve a bit, and embrace Clementine being my "baby", and start to love the idea of our family being "complete".
June 2011: I unexpectedly get pregnant. I can't wrap my mind around it. Richard takes it philosophically and moves on, while I scream "WHY!?" and am in complete denial. I've emotionally accepted and embrace no more babies, and now I have to do a complete flip-flop and get myself ready for another baby! I find this very difficult.
August 2011: I start having some abdominal pain and go in for an ultrasound. I'm sure I have an ectopic pregnancy or something else bad, but I get to see a tiny little 7 week old BABY with a heart just pumping away and it's pretty amazing and I'm happy that everything is okay. But still my heart's not 100% there and I'm totally anxious about how I'll manage 5 kids.
Summer-Early Fall 2011: I decide to just ignore the fact that I'm pregnant and deal with it when I can't ignore it anymore. Besides being tired, I don't even feel pregnant so it's pretty easy to be in denial for my whole first trimester.
October 2011 (20 weeks along): I hit the halfway point, and suddenly I'm gigantic and feeling VERY pregnant. I can't ignore it anymore, it's very noticeable and I have to buy maternity clothes and I start feeling uncomfortable a lot. I'm also feeling baby moving a ton - he or she will not be ignored any longer!
22 weeks along: We go in as a family for an ultrasound and see our adorable baby. Richard feels sure it's a boy, but we don't find out officially. I start feeling slight urges to buy baby things and being nesting...
January 2012: I'm in my 3rd trimester and I'm actually really excited for another baby! I begin collecting and making things for baby, making lists, thinking about projects I want to get done, etc etc.
March 2012: We have unseasonably warm, spring-like weather and it feels like the world is budding with new life. I am thrilled to be expecting another addition to our family and feel like 5 children will be no big deal! (What's one more at this point, right?) The kids are excited as well and we've gotten everything ready for Baby to come! Despite developing the worst case of PUPPPs imaginable around 7 weeks before my due date, which involves vicious itchiness, millions of blisters all over my body and miserable sleepless nights, I find myself drawing closer to God and feeling thankful for the privilege of carrying new life.
So here we are! The next post will probably be to announce the birth of our next baby. I'm already looking forward to our first walk to the library with FIVE children. =]
|7 week old Baby Six|
|20 weeks along and feeling gigantic!|
|Baby Six at 22 weeks old|
|PUPPPS. You do not want this.|
|Our family at Christmas.|