Thursday, February 21, 2008

Baby


We joyfully welcome into our family
Judah Michael
born on
Tuesday, February 19th, 2008 at 9:03pm
weighing 8 pounds, 9 ounces
and measuring 20 inches long

Our homebirth went beautifully and was a precious time together for our whole family. We are so thankful for our sweet new baby boy. The Lord has indeed blessed us and been good to our family.

I'll try to post Judah's birth story in more detail later! And of course many more pictures will be coming as well.

Thank you all for your prayers!


Saturday, February 16, 2008

Overdue

Still pregnant. Still HUGE. Still no baby. Feeling antsy, impatient, a little frustrated, discontent. Everything feels READY, but there's no BABY! I need patience... my midwife called this morning and offered a natural induction technique, but I declined, seeing in my heart that I wanted to control when this baby comes instead of trusting God's timing. So we're still waiting. Has anyone ever stayed pregnant indefinitely?

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Due

due [doo]– adjective
1. owed at present; having reached the date for payment: This bill is due.
2. rightful; proper; fitting: due care; in due time.
3. under engagement as to time; expected to be ready, be present, or arrive; scheduled: The plane is due at noon.

Today I am officially "due." Which means I have "reached the date for payment" and that my baby is "expected to be ready and to arrive." But I have to agree with those who view a due date as merely the mid-point in a "due month." After all, it's perfectly normal for babies to be born 2 weeks before or after their expected due date. So I'm not too phased by the thought that today could come and go with no baby. This weekend is looking more probable to me as a potential delivery time, but that too is just a feeling.

I've been thinking about how pregnancy is such a cool image of our waiting for Christ's return. The sense of longing, the looking for sign, the burning desire to meet a person you love but have never seen face to face.

Lord, may I long to see You, long for your coming, look eagerly for the signs, remembering that only the Father knows the day and the hour. I want to see you, Lord. May this longing for my baby's birth be a shadow of the desire I have for Your arrival.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Thirty Nine Weeks


Yes, today I've completed 39 weeks of pregnancy. This is what my "Pregnancy Stages" email newsletter had to say for this week:
Many women suddenly get an overwhelming urge to clean and
straighten absolutely everything around this time -- especially
during the slow waiting game at the end of pregnancy. This
nesting instinct is a
ctually a biological drive, so as long as you
don't go crazy (no dusting from atop a high ladder, for example)
go with it!
My Baby
This kid is ready to go! All of his systems are up and running, and
his brain is functioning better every day. Your fully developed
baby is now biding his time, getting in some R&R during his final
days in the womb.

My Life
Nesting's great and all, but make sure it doesn't get out of control --
you're not superwoman, remember? Don't push yourself too far;
your baby certainly won't know whether you've taken a toothbrush
to the grout in the bathroom. Best to save up some of that energy
-- you're gonna need it for labor!




Well, the nesting instinct has been very strong, especially since we're planning a homebirth and all the activity will happen here. I feel this overwhelming urge to make sure everything is in order at all times!!! It's the only time I can remember vacuuming more than once a day (usually it's somewhere around once a week!) and doing tiny loads of laundry all the time ("Aaugh! There's three dirty socks and a dishtowel in the hamper! Must do laundry!!" And this coming from the woman who normally finds the most ingenious ways to s-t-r-e-t-c-h the time between loads of laundry, as in "just sponge off the front of that shirt and it will be fine to wear again.") Also, why do I feel the need to wash the baseboards in the kitchen? I'm usually good if I get the sticky handprints washed off the front of the fridge. The upside is that being on hands and knees can help turn a posterior baby, if this one should happen to be so. Anyway, I've folded and refolded the baby clothes multiple times, repacked the tub of birth supplies, and put 3 dozen muffins in the freezer. Never know when you'll want a muffin. So I think I'm ready. If only no one had to LIVE here until the baby is born!

On the other side of things, I feel really content being pregnant still. It's a precious time that I have with my baby and I don't want to wish it away. I remember the last 3 weeks of my pregnancy with Matthias being TORTURE because I was so anxious for it to be over and to be holding my baby. Then afterwards I wished I would have treasured each of those days with him inside me while he was still alive. I felt like I cheated myself out of time with my baby by wishing it away. And then with Moses, I again was discontent at the end of my pregnancy, feeling that I had waited SO LONG to hold a baby in my arms that I just couldn't wait for the pregnancy to be over. Two nine-month pregnancies back-to-back seemed like too long to wait to have a living baby. That lead to a 38-week induction, which I wish I would have passed on and just waited for labor to happen naturally. I'm glad there has been grace for me in all these shortcomings.

So here I am, one week from my due date. Baby has "dropped" (leaving me feeling less cramped for space internally, but with a strange sensation that the baby is going to fall out if I stand for too long) and I've had plenty of "warm-up" signs like strong, irregular contractions, cramping and a dull lower-back ache. None of this means that I'll deliver imminently, but that yes, it will happen eventually. Could be more than a week. My midwife offered to do a "stretch and sweep" at my appointment next week if I haven't delivered by then, to help get labor going. But I think I'll decline. I am (mostly, usually) content in this moment, hugely pregnant with a baby I love dearly, feeling those violent hiccups and cramped stretches. One of the lessons and the blessings God taught me through losing Matthias is to be content, joyful, thankful, at peace, right here, right now. I'm certainly NOT those things all the time, or even most of the time. But more than I used to be.

"Just as you do not know the path of the wind and how bones are formed in the womb of the pregnant woman, so you do not know the activity of God who makes all things." Ecclesiastes 11:5

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

International Day


Every year our homeschool co-op has an International Day, in which each family researches a country and gives a report to the group. Afterwards we have an international potluck where everyone brings a dish from their country. It's been a fun and very interesting tradition. Grace has presented on Spain and Ireland, and this year she gave her report on Guatemala. My parents had taken a trip there and brought back some cool artifacts, so Grace's interest was peaked and she readily researched all she could. She did a great presentation and looked adorable in her Guatemalan outfit.

Explaining the meaning of the Guatemalan flag's coat-of-arms.


Afterwards she said, "Mama, have you ever put a whole bunch of time and work into something and then afterwards you feel like it's just over so fast? I mean, I did hours of work and then my report was just like five minutes." I said, "Yeah, Grace, I know the feeling."

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Homebirth: Not Just for Hippies

Here's my official announcement that Richard and I are planning a homebirth with this baby. My reasons for posting this information are 1) I'm really excited about it and want to share! 2) To allow you to process the shock and horror in privacy instead of face-to-face, and 3) To attempt to answer the obvious questions, "Why would you do that?! Are you crazy?" "Is it safe?" "Are you turning into some kind of hippy Earth-muffin birth-goddess weirdo?"

We (well mostly I) have done a
considerable amount of reading and research on this topic. If you'll take a look at the link list on the sidebar you'll see a sampling. Neither Richard nor I have made this decision without much thought, prayer, discussion and research. Our conclusion is that giving birth at home is safe, comfortable, convenient, affordable and overall more desirable than birthing in a hospital. So here goes.

First, the biggest reason why most people never consider a homebirth, because it obviously can't be as safe as birth in a hospital. Right? Well, the answer found in numerous recent studies
is that for a woman who
•has a low-risk pregnancy (i.e. no pre-eclampsia or history of incompetent cervix, for example)
•is planning a homebirth (i.e. not giving birth at home because she didn't make it to the hospital in time!)
has a trained, experienced birth attendant with her (i.e. a trained midwife, not a friend or a nurse or a dentist)
and who lives within a reasonable distance to a hospital,
giving birth at home poses no greater risk to the health and life of the mother and baby than in a hospital. Even better, women who fit these categories and who birth at home greatly decrease their risk of surgical and medical interventions like episiotomy, forceps or vacuum extraction, and c-section. The cesarean section rate for attended homebirths in 2000 was 3.7% vs 19.1% for intended hospital births.

Cascade of Intervention

At home, birth is allowed to unfold as nature intended. Because a woman feels safe in her home and is not disturbed by unfamiliar hospital staff and procedures, the hormones of labor are usually capable of moving her labor along naturally without interventions. Many maternity interventions have unintended effects, especially during labor and birth. Often these effects are new problems that are "solved" with further intervention, which may in turn create yet more problems. This chain of events has been called the "cascade of intervention."

This chain of events can change the course of a woman's labor in important ways, yet couples often have little or no awareness that many interventions are used within a cascade of unwanted side effects. In many instances, these interventions cause problems because they disrupt the normal physiology of pregnancy, labor and birth. For example:
•When a woman is exposed to bright lights, unnecessary activity and strangers performing intimate exams the release of both oxytocin and endorphins are inhibited by the overproduction of stress hormones.
•This slows the progress of labor and intensifies the feelings of pain. It is not uncommon for a woman's contractions to slow upon arrival at the hospital.
•This may lead to augmentation with pitocin, a synthetic form of the hormone oxytocin. Pitocin has been associated with poor fetal heart rates possibly due to the strength and frequency of the contractions it causes.
•This apparent stress on the baby often leads to a c-section.
•Furthermore, the intensity of pitocin-induced contractions leaves the majority of women seeking an epidural. Epidurals are associated with maternal fever, and poor fetal heart rates which again leads many OBs to recommend a c-section.
In choosing a midwife-attended homebirth, we are seeking to avoid unnecessary interventions and the complications they often lead to. We know that at times it becomes prudent to transport to the hospital from home and even benefit from some of the above named interventions, and are willing to do that if necessary. (Hospital transport occurs in less than 10% of all intended homebirths.) Most importantly, the decision to intervene is made in conjunction with our midwife, with full explanation of the benefits and the risks, allowing us to be active participants in our care and birth experience.

The Benefit of Midwives
Midwives are guardians and keepers of normal, healthy pregnancy and birth.

They believe that birth is a natural process, not a disease, and trust in the natural ability of women's bodies to birth their babies.

Midwives are experts in normal birth.
Midwives have been educated and have experience in providing individualized, hands-on support throughout the childbearing year (pregnancy, birth, postpartum). They have expertise in nutrition, natural childbirth, breastfeeding and early parenting, as well as in identifying situations and conditions that fall outside the norm (referring to other care providers when necessary). They follow the Midwives Model of Care.

The Midwifery Model of Care

The Midwifery Model of Care is based on the fact that pregnancy and birth are normal life events. The Midwifery Model of Care includes:
  • Monitoring the physical, psychological, and social well-being of the mother throughout the childbearing cycle
  • Providing the mother with individualized education, counseling, and prenatal care, continuous hands-on assistance during labor and delivery, and postpartum support
  • Minimizing technological interventions
  • Identifying and referring women who require obstetrical attention
The application of this woman-centered model of care has been proven to reduce the incidence of birth injury, trauma, and cesarean section.
The practice of homebirth is very supportive of mother/infant bonding, and indeed midwives strive to protect this most intimate time allowing for the creation and strengthening of the mother-baby bond and unification of the entire family. Babies remain in constant contact with mom from the moment of birth onward. If any assistance is given to aid in baby's breathing it is done on the bed next to mom, where she may touch and speak to her baby. The hospital routine of taking the baby from the mother is not practiced in homebirths.
More Benefits of Homebirth
Continuity of Care
When having a home birth, the care providers remain consistent throughout the entire labor and delivery. There is no change of shift to new caregivers who may or may not understand or value your choices for birthing. Plus, a caregiver who has done all your prenatal work and has been with you throughout your entire labor is more likely to notice potential problems early on and take steps to prevent it or to transfer you to the hospital.

Unlimited Birth Companions
In a hospital, you are usually limited as to the number of companions you're allowed. In addition, none of your other children are allowed, which can be a distraction as you wonder whether the needs of your other children are being met. During a homebirth, children may be allowed to come and go as needed, so that they are still able to interact with their mama as she allows. This can also lessen the burden on the family of securing childcare during a hospital stay.

Safety

Research consistently shows that homebirth only is as safe or safer than hospital birth. There is a documented reduced risk of infection when giving birth at home.

Freedom from Interventions
When birthing at home, no routine interventions such as shaving, enemas, or IV fluids are required. You are not bound by arbitrary hospital policy. You're also able to eat and drink as you choose, which boosts your energy for a lengthy labor. Almost no hospitals allow eating and drinking, which can lead to fatigue and dehydration. Some interventions can still be undertaken at home if indicated, such as fetal monitoring.

Unlimited Labor Choices
When having a homebirth, only your imagination limits your choices for labor. You may labor in whatever positions or environments you choose. In early labor, you can walk around your neighborhood or relax in the tub. You have all the comforts of your familiar home to help maintain the deep relaxation that facilitates a natural childbirth. Plus you don't have to pack up and drive to the hospital while you're in labor! Nice.

Comfort
At home, you are allowed maximum control over your environment, from the clothes you wear to background music or even dozing in bed. A homebirth also offers increased privacy from student nurses or medical interns interrupting your birth experience.


Sorry, I know this has been really long. But honestly, that's just the tip of the iceberg. Three great books I've read expand on the issues of normal, non-medicated, physiological birth versus medically managed, drugged, interventionist-minded birth. I would really recommend them for anyone who wants to have children, is planning a pregnancy, is pregnant or has had children!

The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer
Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin
The Birth Book: Everything You Need to Know to Have a Safe and Satisfying Birth by William Sears and Martha Sears

We'd love to talk more about homebirth with anyone who's interested. I knew very early on in this pregnancy that I wanted to birth at home, but Richard said "No Way!" Then I had him read an article, read some book excerpts to him, talked, reasoned, cajoled... and now he's a bigger homebirth advocate than I am! Some friends even j0kingly told him he should become a midwife.

But don't worry, we won't make an offering to the Birth Goddess or chant and light candles and burn incense or make a potion from the placenta (yes, some people do...). We've simply examined some long-held assumptions about birth, hospitals and homes, and feel this is the best option for our family.

Monday, January 21, 2008

Moses' First Haircut!

The day finally came where I gave in and admitted that it was time for my baby to have a haircut. I love his curls. I love how thick and curly and golden his hair is! But it was starting to get difficult to keep nice, i.e. frizzy and sticking up all over the place. And it was getting long. Really long. As in long enough for him to be mistaken for a girl all the time. So I had to consent the the haircut. Here's the before and after pics:

Love those curls!!

In the chair...He really did not enjoy this at all. Thankfully it was all over before too long.


Shorn!
The curls are gone!!



Now he really looks like a big boy. I guess it's appropriate and good, as he won't be the baby in just a few weeks, but it was still a little sad for me to see all his baby curls dropping to the floor. And is it just me, or has he started acting older since the haircut? Does he know he's graduated to a new level of maturity? Richard says it's all in my head, but I swear his grunted replies to my questions hold new depth and meaning.


Friday, January 18, 2008

Waiting


Right now we're waiting for our chick to hatch, and it's been a time of very busyness and also of burrowing in and nesting. I hope there's grace for me as I am pitifully behind in returning phone calls, emails, getting together with friends, blogging, etc. I still love you all! So much of my energy and resources are focused toward this hatching, though. Look for our newest member to arrive somewhere around mid-February!

In the meantime, I'd like to get some Christmas pictures posted and at least one blog entry about our planned homebirth. Yes, I said HOMEBIRTH!! More on that later, hopefully!

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Four Years

December 19th, 2003

Four Years
Three Babies
Two Homes
One Grace Ann

Countless blessings.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

My Family

I just have to share some recent pictures of my beautiful family.

(Moses wasn't too happy in this picture)


Okay, not that recent, but here's some pictures of Grace at a stream with Grandma this summer.Grace and Grandma Sue


Moses likes to climb into the pantry to scrounge for food. I do feed him, honest.Isn't that cloth diaper so cute?!Grace playing her favorite game with Moses: Starving Orphans. Click on the picture to get a close up of her sign. Notice she doesn't want food or money, only "household things" so that she can furnish her hovel.

My awesome babywearing hubby. "Yeah, I'm crunchy."



Waiting for Papa to come home from work

The first picture of our newest member. Another button-nosed Mailly baby! What do you think, boy or girl? We decided to wait until birth to find out.


They love to read together.



My special candle lit for Matthias on October 15th, Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.


Playing outside on a clear autumn day.


His new favorite thing - looking at airplanes.

Grace trying really hard to get Moses in his swing.


Richard and I were talking this morning about the blessing of children and how really rich we are. It's so true. These pictures remind me of my true wealth.
"A new born babe brings
Light to the cottage,
Warmth to the hearth,
And joy to the soul,
For wealth is family
And family is wealth."
~Irish Proverb